say it with resolution!

I am not waiting until New Year's to begin my resolutions.

Stay tuned for a more detailed list.

chocolate and stress

This is for Robyn...

As if we weren't expecting multiple high calorie days last week, we somehow fit in our cake tasting on Tuesday. It's going to look something like this, alternating white and chocolate cake with buttercream frosting and filling and NO FONDANT except for the cherry blossoms. That morning before work, I decided I should probably check some different cakes to get ideas. When I saw that picture in my Google Image search, it was love at first sight. I am confident it will be love at first bite, too!

Here's a little pearl of wisdom for anyone who faces stress in their life:

.dance.

Tonight I wasn't feeling well. We got out to look at the Rhema Christmas Lights (I know, isn't that ridiculous?) and there was music playing over the loud speaker. So I danced. I embarrassed the love of my life in front of a crowd. My arms were flailing, my feet were off rhythm, but I was dancing. And it fixed everything; no lie!

Also, if you're stressed, this movie quote might help:

"I used to live my life worrying about tomorrow and then I did some research and discovered something important...10 out of 10 people...die." - Bella

The Tank of Sharks

I go into Bed Bath & Beyond the other night, mom in tow, determined to pick out what pots and pans we'll be registering for and get the things I don't need JT for like muffin pans and crock pots and whatnot. To me, all I see is a frenzy: shelves and shelves that stretch higher and wider than I can see with three different versions of the same product taunting me with popular brands and differing prices. I didn't know the first place to begin.

Half an hour later, I have handled every pan in the store with no decision about cookware. My mom says I should register for heavy, cast-iron pots at Savory Chef because nonstick pans won't last two years and they make her want to vomit because of the screeching sound they make with fingernails during dishwashing. Do I really want to register for pans that are hundreds of dollars more expensive? I'm not convinced.

So I came out of Bed Bath & Beyond with increasing frustration for all that is nonstick, stainless steel and cast iron.

My only purchase? This trinket, the only thing I knew I absolutely had to have, no matter what JT had to say about it.


update - 01/26/09: my boss and his wife ended up buying this for us. I have taken to fondly calling him Skark because I accidentally wrote it on all of our thank you lists, thank you notes, etc. Nine months into our marriage, he appears in all of my finished recipe photos as the signature trademark, and rightfully so: he is my sous chef!

1110

Planning a wedding has been crazy, to say the least.

But it's been a little over three weeks and we have a church, a reception place, pastors, a caterer, a photographer, a dress, bridesmaids dresses, a florist, a band, musicians for the ceremony, candelabras, a place to make our cake, centerpieces almost figured out, and probably more.

And we have each other.

I am incredibly blessed every day to have JT in my life. He's kind and spontaneous and considerate and strong and passionate and bold and smart. He's a student of life, an artist, an athlete, a wonderful friend, and he's mine. He's not the man I have always dreamed of; he's proof that God knows our hearts and has better for us than ever could have imagined.

I can't wait to be his wife.

Until then, it will be busy busy busy as we try to merge our family traditions and tastes and opinions on everything. Our alone time has become more precious. Moments seem stolen and that much more sweet.

My mother, on the other hand, is full speed and million miles a minute as far as wedding talk goes. I don't think I've had a conversation with her that doesn't revolve around the wedding. That can be exhausting. We did find the most amazing candelabras today at a little florist shop. They are wrought iron, very reminiscent of the medieval/gothic period, and have intentional flaws that give them character.

Alone time and girl time has been lacking. I am kicking Project LGN into full force again. I am going to be one hott, buff bride if I have anything to say about it. My abs are certainly saying something about it today. Ughh!

So I am hanging on. Things at work have been crazy, but we're hiring two new people on Monday, so my job will get a lot easier. I'll have a more appropriate workload, anyway. You have no idea how relieved I am.

My goal, sometime in the near future, is to make it a habit to get up at least an hour early. That way I can exercise and pray and write and spend time by myself to gather my wits and strength to face another day. One thing I have learned is that sometimes being awake in a leisurely, relaxed frame of mind can be loads better than sleep for the sake of energy and sanity and peace.

How I Found My Dress

I had tried on about six dresses at places in Tulsa and had picked one that I loved everywhere I went. We went to OKC to search on Saturday and went to four boutiques and two bridal "warehouse" places. In both of those, I tried on several I liked, but the people who helped me kept bringing dresses even after I said I didn't like something about a dress. I ended up leaving with dresses still left to try on in the room because it frustrated me! (I hate hate hate that Davids Bridal doesn't have mirrors inside the rooms, too!!)

It was kind of a God thing how I found THE DRESS. I knew it would have to be because I couldn't imagine loving a dress so much and knowing without a doubt that a dress was going to be THE DRESS I marry JT in. I had made an itinerary of places in Oklahoma City based on geography. (You would have been so proud of me!) Well one of the girls I was with (I went with two of my bridesmaids.) had to be home around five, so I decided to skip JJ Kelly and go to the furthest one on the street. Well, that shop ended up only having prom dresses, so we went back to JJ Kelly. Second God thing: this is an appointment-only store, but the lady had a cancellation RIGHT when I walked in, and said since we were from Tulsa and didn't know, we could have the spot.

You see, the place I found THE DRESS wasn't like other boutiques. They had dresses in the back and you told the worker what you wanted and they brought options. I was paired with the owner of the shop, I found out. She closes the door to my dressing room and waves her finger. "Strip down," she says matter-of-factly. I had no time to feel uncomfortable; this woman meant no nonsense! She made me put on one of those little strapless bra/corset things and strip to my underwear. I felt a little uncomfortable for a second, but then I didn't care that a total stranger was seeing me in my underwear if it meant she could help me find THE DRESS!

I tried on THE DRESS first and loved it, but wanted to see other dresses. Two more were iffy. I tried on a strapless dress that was gorgeous and it had a really pretty sash I liked. I was almost sold on that, but I felt an urge to try on THE DRESS again. When I tried it on a second time, I was sold. I knew it was THE DRESS for me. We tried different trains and headpieces with it and I couldn't get over how gorgeous it was and how it combined everything I wanted in THE DRESS with the things I had discovered I like from trial and error (like the neck on it). My eyes watered a little!

This purple hair lady came in and bought a pink wedding dress and veil to renew her vows for her 50th anniversary with her husband. She told us they got married because they were in love and "people didn't live in sin back in those days!" She went on to tell us that she has only been with one man and can't find girls nowadays who have saved themselves for their husbands. I was so proud to tell her differently, and to have both of my friends join in!

So now I have THE DRESS and it will be in on time and I just need to decide if I want a veil or a flower in my hair and all of that accessory mumbo jumbo!

(oh, and while I was in OKC, my handsome, wonderful JT washed Xi-Xi inside and outside and put a brand new bike rack on her! I love love love him!)

HOORAY!

I FOUND A WEDDING DRESS!!! Comment with your email address if you want to see!

Secrecy is vital. You understand :)